FML?


Everyone is all over Facebook with this FML status update. For those of you who are over the age of 70 or cannot read, FML is the acronym for F*ck My Life. Therefore, when something bad is going on in a person’s life they post FML to either their status updates or friend’s wall (in lieu of taking any personal responsiblity or solving the problem). Some of these FML updates are just hilarious because they do no seem to warrant the FML label, which should only be used in times of deep distress.

Appropriate times to use FML on Facebook.

1. The results are in. It’s full blown. FML

2. Just found out my husband has a vagina. FML

3. I’m NOT the father, but my dad is. FML

4. I was so hungry I could eat a horse…so I did. FML

5. Driving to work during Snowmaggedon. Got stuck. Couldn’t see a thing. Car battery died. Then I got hungry. So I ate my own scab. FML

6. I can see my own butt from the front. FML

7. The greeter at Wal-Mart has better teeth than me. FML

8. I got caught pleasuring myself to pictures of myself. FML

9. My boyfriend has a faux-hawk. FML

10. I just got bitch-slapped by my mom’s boyfriend’s boyfriend. FML

11. John Edwards isn’t dead. FML

12. My wife de-friended me. FML

Elderly FML’s:

I sleep on plastic sheets. FML

Every day I’m dying. FML

Left my dentures in a man’s pants. FML

Had a dream I wasn’t super old. FML

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